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My Newest Vice

Posted by dmjstephens on November 26, 2008

I’m normally a huge energy drink before civil procedure, coke at lunch, coke right before contracts kind of guy.  Law school has finally made me realize that my childish caffeine intake mechanisms were not going to cut it.  It’s time to grow up and drink coffee.

I realized this after getting a free cup at the law school last week.  It was Starbucks, and I have to admit that it was the first cup of coffee I ever tasted without regretting it.  Instantly, I was hooked.  Somehow I was immediately able to stand the taste, and it no longer mattered if I was drinking Starbucks or gas station Folgers.  I loved it all.  

I felt like a coke-head smoking his first crack rock.  I wanted more and more.  I wanted to make it so strong I’d have to eat it with a spoon.  It was like I was a superhero.  I have never felt so sharp and alert in my entire life.  On the bus ride home I felt like I could rip my seat out, throw it through the window, jump out and run home.  I felt capable of sitting down, memorizing all billion Federal Rules of Civil Procedure and loving it.  I could have run a marathon though my heart would have exploded.  I was invincible.  

This only lasted a few days, then it turned into just a normal caffeine boost but with a better comedown since it has less sugar.  Either way, I’m a convert.  I guess this means I’m an adult now.  I’ll always love coffee, if for no other reason than it was the final vice in my complete set.  I’ve noticed three vices that a number seemingly disproportionate to that of the general population of law students share: cigarettes, booze, and coffee.  

You some cigarettes to relieve stress from papers, reading, and outlining.  You drink coffee to give you energy to do papers, reading, and outlining, because you never get any sleep due to the stress.  You drink because you want to cut loose after a week of working hard doing papers, reading, and outlining.  They are the three magic tickets to becoming a 45 year old going on his 3rd heart attack and on his way to cancer.  I’m not sure if it’s better or worse to see it coming.


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